Day 427

Good afternoon!  My name is Lauren and I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic/addict.  Now, this may not be true for all, but is for me.  Once I got sober, and rearranged my life and my priorities, it is easier for me to stay clean and sober. But for me to get to that point was a totally different story.  I didn't want to do it.  I didn't think I COULD do it. I thought I would die.  I was comfortable in the miserableness of my life, in denial of everything.  It's weird thinking back sometimes. I was so messed up, I don't know what I was I thinking, or if what I was thinking was what I was even what I was really thinking.  I hate not knowing.  There are chunks of my life missing.  Times gone.  Memories blocked. But once I got to that teetering point, then made that decision, my life changed forever.  But getting there seemed like forever.  It wasn't like I just quit drinking and everything was fine.  It was a process.  I had to mentally make that decision, as well as spiritually, then physically.  Even though I told my body I was done drinking, it didn't like that idea, and it gave me hell for months, my body ached. Today it is better.  Today it is easier.  Today I love my life, clean and sober.  Have a great day!