Day 596

Good afternoon!  My name is Lauren, and I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic/addict.  Sometimes asking God for forgiveness can be a hard thing to do, but that's usually when our ego gets in the way and we don't want to admit we are wrong.  But sometimes the harder things to do is forgive ourselves and leave the guilt behind.  For a long time after I got sober, I still held onto the guilt and shame of some of the things I had done or not done during my drinking days.  It was hard for me to forgive myself for not being the best mother I knew I could be.  I felt terrible.  I knew they were young, but they were smart.  I mean I was there, but I was just there, a physical body, nothing more.  But the only way I could move forward is to let that go, leave the guilt behind me and put one foot in front of the other and go forward.  Take care of my kids from that day forward the best I could.  I couldn't go back, so what was the use of thinking like I could.  So today, I just do the next right thing.  That is all I can do.  That's all I have for today!  Have a great one!