Day 729 Clean & Sober

Good afternoon!  My name is Lauren, and I'm a grateful, recovering alcoholic/addict.  Addiction and alcoholism is a "cunning and baffling" disease as the Big Book calls it.  It is the scary how it makes us think that we are not addicts, that we are "normies."  I will never be normal and I'm ok with that.  I know that my addiction is still in the back of my head doing pushups, just waiting for the right time to trip me up.  Just waiting for the right trigger, the right opportunity, the right smell, to catch me off guard.  But I have to have my ammo stacked up.  I have a sponsor I call when I need help, I have a Big Book, I have my other Big Black Book, the Bible, that I go to, I pray to my God, I go to meetings, I do meditations in the mornings.  I do all these things to keep my sobriety in check, because I will never be healed, I will never be recovered. My addiction is always there, and that disease is will trick me to tell me I am better, that I don't need these things, so that is can creep back into my life.  So I will do what I need to to stay on top and make the right decisions.  That's all for today.  Have a great one!